36 collages

12.27.10

The room that we live in grows more complete; cold water, then hot.

Dishwasher then not. (A leak). Repair parts ordered.
Boards scraped then stained.
A pot of fennel and sweet potato stew.
I look up the Dutch painters, i.e. Vermeer's The Milkmaid to compare them to the before picture of the conditioned space:

Before (I like the quality of light through this window.) It does feel like the way the light was painted in those Dutch works.


After
The rehab began in Dec of 2005. My mom was still alive. I was giddy to own property. Little did I know what was involved, how intense, and demanding the building restoration would be.

I almost don't know how to act. everything is clean, beautiful, tremendous, new floors, shiny stainless steel, and the inevitable scratch or ding. How to live comfortably with grace? And how to get my art back on track?
I've got the exhibit opening at Birger Sandzen Jan 9th. Something to look forward to- the frames are contemporary and fresh-
The room at the gallery:


It will look nice. 36 fresh collages.

Trip

October 2010
Lots of sunlight early and late, made photographing a joy.

Back from a trip. Brought the camera and took lots of photos- (see Facebook, too). Passed some quirky things; "Sore Loser Tattoo" , "Alive Again Taxidermy", "Prestige Laundry & Snack Bar" & my favorite, while driving at night-- among huge mountain passes, pitch black, the yellow diamond sign, "Watch for Rocks". Yikes! We did not stay here:

Though we did visit this rock shop: Large ostrich eggs, with the promise of an omelet recipe.



There were no rocks or cafe-- just the sign.









This was the entrance to a cattle ranch:

Wonderful folk art

Though dinosaurs may have roamed the long ago this was the only one I spotted: It was busy eating a manikin and no relation to this cowboy: Who sadly had a hole where his crotch should be.

Which reminds me of the many rest stops en route-


I was sad to return to chaos and stress - the building saga, problems galore. Though I learned my collages are part of a two person exhibit at the Birger Sandzen Gallery in KS!

Will it ever be easy, complete, sane? Still glad to get away and see some beauty, as ever, it is there waiting, resonant, willing, and calm.

Until later.

Andrea Fuhrman c 2010

Fleur d Lisle

October 4, 2010
Visited KS City last weekend- show at the Buttonwood, "Visions of the Flint Hills" benefit for the Kansas Park Trust. My two framed landscape photos are in it shameless promotion:($300. each)- for a great cause!

The Flint Hills are a beautiful place to walk, watch clouds, bees, lizards, see sky, so peaceful.
In KS City I discovered how nice it was to sit on my friend's porch and feel the sun, in a green landscaped neighborhood. I live in a rural downtown town, so my glimpse at "nature" is to see beetles crawling out of the cracks in the sidewalk- that I must fix someday.

Took more super macro photos yesterday:Finished reading Ingrid Betancourt's book called Even Silence Has an End - stirring. She was a political prisoner of FARC in Columbia for 6 plus years. Weirdly (and inappropriately) I have only been hostage of this building rehab for five years.
I'm watching Wild China, a dvd set produced by the BBC of the wildlife, flora and land of China. Huge land- so much variation in climate. Breathtaking gorgeous imagery.

Purchased a lovely lace like dresser for the apt. A small treat for storing things. A concrete wish for being able to actually use the dresser, to have some order. Time to bring up all the old bureaus and put clothing from suitcases into drawers. I do wonder why I have all this stuff?

Something I have been noticing a lot lately is that the Fleur de Lisle keeps coming up as an image. In Home Depot splash back tile; as a flash of something in a film, or on clothing, a finial, etc. As the word "chaos" was a word for me in 2009 while I used photography to shoot my way out of my misery- to DO something productive while I felt so stuck and helpless about myself.
Protection. Heraldic. Boy Scouts. A flower. Purity and Chasity.
Now it's Fleur de Lisle coming up everywhere. (This one's borrowed from Wikipedia).


I was soothed the other day by a song by Alanis Morrisette, "That I would be good". How to hold on to the beauty in everyday?


My work, #2601 is finally on its way to the Bryn Mawr Rehab Hospital for the ArtAbility exhibit. I won the photo award for this work.

I will be submitting work to the 27th Annual Five State Photo exhibit in Hays KS. It's being juried by two folks who have been to Photo Fest in Houston which I was told is a good place to have art photography reviewed.





#2601 Andrea Fuhrman c 2009

That all of us would be good.

Bugs, allergies, remanents, elderberry

Sept 9, 2010

Crickets, cicadas, crawly things, elderberry and an infant. What a lovely day. Do I take the elderberry? It doesn't smell very appealing. Babysitting Fisher - he's the ultimate exquisite baby.
I am loving the book by Susan Piver, How Not to be Afraid of Your Own Life. Meditation as a way of being present. Being lovable and gentle with myself along with the rest of the human race.

Bought more lumber. Duane is using an orbital palm sander w/ hook & loop sanding discs on the joint compound. He wants a Makita instead of the tool he's got.I put the sheet rock and wood donut holes from the pipes and can lights in the window. He trimmed the 7" discs so there are curved remnants. I like round. Circles, pods, spheres. Like the planet we are on.


I dream of lime as a color, shades of it, and hot red and blues and purples and sage and turquoise.
Colors of an old film Sweet November.









Working on the Supermacro series. I burn a new dvd to run as a slide loop- so here's what it looked like last night in the display window:








I'm humbled by the other photographers mentioned on Arthood. I'm applying to other places to show my work. Ideas welcome.

Been busy

September 2
Baby sat for little Fisher today.
My re-entry into caring for friends' child in a long time.
He's 3 months, filled out, with excellent communication. Fussy when hungry, wet or tired.
So easy to please. Expressed milk from mom and he suckles it happily. The incredible beauty and translucency of his eyelids when he naps. His attentiveness to things in the world, the wind chimes, my breath, the sound of chirping peepers in his rocking "bed".

I've framed two small photos lately- for a show in KS City. They are images of the Flint Hills, and more representational than the abstract photos.

I attempted framing the two works w/ plexi- and as usual, the world is not static (dust, spots, etc.) free. A struggle.




Have had some chaos lately; sent a large photo to a show in PA. UPS dropped and damaged the crated work-and sent me the "balance" of the item.
So the frame is being repaired, the print and mat damaged. Had to reprint the photo- and the printer I use has a new machine, so the colors aren't the same. Do I send the revised work back to the PA venue? I'm supposed to hear back from UPS soon about whether they will honor the insurance that they accepted when they took the package.

Last week I was a panelist for a grant-giving organization. Reviewed lots of images, stories, listened to music and watched film clips from talented artists. It was really interesting and challenging to determine who was actually meeting the guidelines and whose projects sound feasible, innovative, unique-- or are they enterprising concepts? A bit of some juxtaposition and even contradiction here. Something that is innovative may not actually be marketable.

At the hotel where I stayed overnight I simply channel surfed and watched with horror about parasites on Animal Planet.

Shot some photos from the hotel room: The bed, the view, the a/c vent.











The sheetrock is receiving its coat of joint compound. A luscious kind of painterly strokes with a knife. Happy to do it, despite the enormity of the whole project. I remember working at a gallery in Chicago and loving the application of spackle to cover over the holes and pencil marks from the absent art.










Another oil spill today in the Gulf.
What kind of karma that area has.
Or what kind of greed and corrupt practice to foul the water.
The blue planet. The water of which we are also comprised of.

Have watched a fabulous series about water shot in "HD". The filming is spectacular, but the writing and narration fails. I could watch it without sound, as kind of a silent magical panorama of images. (Silly note: Reminds me of an earlier TV channel that showed a Yule log burning in the fireplace on XMAS day.)
So I've been busy.

To Salina today. Saw a great graffiti en route. Took some photos of it on my return. Luscious painterly shapes, a bit reminiscent of Guston? Or Morris Graves?
Had lunch with a friend who is an actor. Asian chicken salad. Iced coffee. So interesting to learn about the discipline of acting to be the art where one's body is the art; one's expression, movement, speech, affect, emotion. She made a beautiful drawing of a costume for a performance. Brave and brilliant. We talked about Louise Nevelson's fabulous eyelashes.

In my work I appropriate, circle round the image, editing and forming it to my own aesthetic. I react, recreate, respond, and putter. Yet when out taking photos, I am exposed, and possibly observed while I work- if a car or truck zooms by. I hide myself behind the camera, and peek into a world of my own making.

Tomorrow, make new DVD slide loops of my newest work and prepare to ship framed piece to a show.

My parents' wedding anniversary tomorrow, if they were alive.

Splash!

Visited the Kenwood Cove Water Park today to shoot peopled images of the Byzantine smalti glass mural designed by me! Wonderful to enter the wave pool, and float near the mural wall. The lifeguard whistled me away from the wall however- perhaps when the waves occur there may be someone who bumps their head? We swam the "lazy river" which has a current, circling the water park. We opted to go "tubeless" while hoards of people floated by. At one part of the part are a series of water slides, which looked like fun. I showered off the chlorine and the room smelled of lotion and dampness.
Yet I remember being little and being very scared of the long wooden slides at Steeplechase. I think I tried it once. I remember the "picnics" that my father's workplace offered to employees. A whole day at Steeplechase. I went wild. Funny mirrors, a caterpillar ride that had a top that came over the length of the cars, riding a swing that people sat in slings which were bound by centrifugal force so the arc of the circle became larger. And bountiful cups of vanila ice cream- I took a pack on the Ferris Wheel, while my sister and my father rode the parachute ride- which often got stuck at the top.


Earlier today I took some supermacro photos; but wasn't able to shoot for long.

Progress on the building continues. As I write the sheetrock envelope is being installed. I look forward to using joint compound!

Development & mothering

Went shopping today for building supplies: Sheetrock. Flooring. Purchased food for a guest. Apricots from Turkey. Medjol dates, mission figs, dark chocolate, hummus. Yum. Nice to anticipate fragrant olives, artisan bread w/garlic. Went to the summer reading program at the library, too. Won a 14" pizza from a contributing pizza place!
I am a developer, investing in my property as it slowly, methodically comes together. Great to say goodbye to the old cracked hazardous plaster walls that most likely have lead paint on them. They are full of blow in insulation now. The new "Cherry Island" flooring seems a good match to the mahogany wood trim and reveals and demising wall. I keep daydreaming about lime green paint on the wall and an 11' bookcase in the nook. Goodbye to being uninsulated; there is now a protective barrier of sheetrock on the walls and above the ceiling.
I am so very much enjoying the book The woman who fell from the sky by Jennifer Steil. I love that she bravely traveled to Yemen and took a job to do good work and manage a paper & help staff write with integrity and truth. I'm also struck by her comment to her staff that they do not deserve to be yelled at.
Yet my mom yelled at me all the time; I wonder what made her so angry and unhappy? It is a question I live with every day.
My friend spoke about her new baby; that she has felt the most love for her baby. She is tender and kind to her little one.
So healing for me to observe and get to hold the little person.

Within a vacuum

Yet another hot scorching day. Spent hours vacuuming up the errant insulation that had covered everything. Then I began a book by Jennifer Steil, The Woman who Fell from the Sky, about Yemen. Totally fascinating.
Vacuuming, removing dust. (I did photo a few of the taped over ports for the blow- in insulation.)
I remember my first time attempting to print a photo at Cleveland Institute of Art. I worked on that one print for 8 hours. I was unable to keep the negative clean. I concluded that the world was not dust free, and maybe my focus would not be on printing photographs ( because I thought the result was supposed to be dust free and speckle-less)- after all I had learned that Helen Leavitt did not print her own work. And after another famous photographer ( I can't recall the name) had died leaving hundreds of exposed undeveloped film canisters in his freezer. Hm I wonder if William Eggleston was thinking about that when he shot a photo of the open freezer door looking very glacial, in dire need of defrost, with beautiful cool light. And then that reminds me of being at UCROSS and someone recalled that they had heard about a man shooting his mother-in law mistaking her for an elk rummaging through his freezer and then I made a postcard about it; and then made another one in honor of the Man who Mistook His Wife for a Hat, by Oliver Sacks- who had also written about Dr. Temple Grandin, who despite her autism or because of it is able to design humane slaughter of cows.Wendy Jacob, one of the artists on the residency had designed a squeeze chair and was in contact with Temple Grandin.
And so it goes, and I vacuumed today.

Blow

Yesterday and today. ("Put your lips together and blow"?) Of course it is 107 degrees today with a heat index of 115. Amusing weather to be using the blow in insulation for the little apartment. So very very hot. Last night watched Nova about dark matter and dark energy. How to accommodate this information that we are tiny teeny specks of living organisms?

A term keeps coming up; static kill: BP plans on closing the leaking area- putting mud and cement to regain stasis- so BP can come back at another time to have access to that oil under the ocean floor. I think it was mentioned on Nova & also on The Daily Show. People also refer to what BP has done to the environment is "static". Yet Louisiana sea life : dying because of agricultural run off of poisons (lovely) and oil goo. I am reminded of Antony and the Johnsons' song about leaving this planet because we've ruined it. He sings goodbye to all things alive and beautiful.
The green insulation called green fiber & cocoon cellulose reminds me of papermaking with cotton linter! We're filling in the plaster wall cells. The machine that comes "free to use" from a building supply store is an auger and blower. It takes some babying & trial & error. When the blower shoots insulation out of an area that is open, it "snows" gray. The machine doesn't have a hose clamp & lets go. Ouch! more gray snow. On goes a hose clamp where there was none. Then it's time to shovel & scoop it up & start over, after making sure there are no more surprises. I feel a certain satisfaction feeding papery hunks & listening for the whine to signal the cell is "full".
Some drama getting 16 bags of the stuff into cells & returning equipment (in the truck that has no air conditioning) on a day that the heat index is 115 degrees! Argh!

En route to return of equipment, PBS is on. Obama states" the US will withdraw from Iraq beginning next month(?!)". Just precisely at the same time, a train hurtles past, with sand colored storage containers & trucks, jeeps & all sorts of equipment. Bizarre coincidence. Hmmm, headed for Afghanistan? - or to training camps here in the US (I live near an army base)? I imagine someday soon people will drive those vehicles & using ammunition & be in a hot climate - like it is hot today. And some of those people will kill & be killed. Tragedy.

I film the train, using movie setting on the camera for more than 100 " ( does this mean seconds?) Do I post this or would that be a breach of some sort? The train is bearing all sorts of vehicles in full view of anyone.

So that was all the art and photography I made today. Using duct tape to close the access ports to blow the insulation in. Adding a few more wooden holes to the window display- that were removed to put insulation under the display windows. I'm attaching a photo from the little apt. Not related to anything I've written but I liked the photo. It's an old roller shade on the glass entrance door to the little apt. Now to vacuum and clean and prep to put blue rigid insulation in.

The structure of the project is myself.

Saturday. Got out and shot more images.. wearing bug spray and sunscreen.
Thrilling to download the camera and see the results. My work can be seen on Arthood and Facebook, too. Not sure yet how to post images on this blog- or how to blog on my own website: www.andreafuhrmanfineart.com Comments / suggestions welcome. Thought about my absent parents, my distant friends, my life in art and the rehab of this building. I used to have difficult dreams about buildings that were undergoing renovation, with leaking plumbing, unfinished hallways, stud walls; chaos. I did not know that my life would be mired in building tasks, products, details, tools.
So when I am unable to cope with the structure that is imperfect, ugly, dreary, and seemingly endless, I reach for what I can do; which is to go out in the world and find images that can be captured, reworked into a kind of beauty. I feel that I am painting with the camera. So today I painted, and avoided mosquitoes- though there is a whole crop of crickets that have emerged from the holes in the sidewalk by the building. Have to look up how to handle that.

Read some of Elizabeth Gilbert's novel, Stern Men. How delicious to read about the ocean and islands, and lobsters; I can almost smell the salt air. I wish I could live near an ocean. Why not?
Tomorrow: getting blow in insulation and the blower. Ah reconstruction!

Today it's 96 degrees. At least there's air conditioning. A letter to write, photos to edit, exercise, and take more photos, weather permitting.

Browsed very briefly on the wiki leak site. Stunned and saddened by the war, by the losses people sustain here and there. What can I do? I'm an artist- can't nurse wounded people, I'm not a politician, though I do sign petitions, call my congressional reps, and attempt to do something however minimal.

Liked the film Pirate Radio. The music a joy: invigorating and fresh my favorites in one film; the sea and great music, and some chaotic anarchy.

Tuesday. Listening to Democracy Now about the BP oil spill and the dangerous dispersants in the water and air that will most likely shorten workers lives who work on clean up.
Reading My Guantanamo Diary c 2008, by Mahvish Ruksana Khan. Horrifying that so many people were kidnapped and sent to Gitmo because there was a phenomenal bounty (up to 5 million dollars!) for Taliban and al-Quaida members." Average people in America, and Afghanistan would have to work for 83 years to make that kind of money."

It's difficult to make art in the light of this sorrow in the world. Yet my teacher from grad school would say, "Make art, not war".
Why isn't this country working hard to free our dependence on foreign oil? Why aren't we pushing to use green bio diesel (see Hero BX) and save the planet?( See "Fuel"c 2010 a dvd that I just took out of the library).

Well, it is back to making a dvd that will loop my full images and display on an LCD TV screen. I've tried the 1080p as the height but it still didn't work so well. I will keep experimenting. Another hot day outside. The building repair at a halt for now. How can I have my work reviewed by museums? Is entering competitions the way? I resent / struggle paying the submission fees.

Back to the future

I'm back. After a few years! I've entered the Facebook fray, the Twitter talk and Arthood.
Stopped working with collage and began retracing my photography interests.

Showed work at Salina Art Center last fall; had a photo image used as design for an 11' x 36' Byzantine smalti glass mosaic mural for an aquatic water park (public art!). Still taking photos, and using super macro to create abstractions- using iphoto and photoshop.

The building has one small apartment that is improving. Sheetrocked ceiling with insulation, and HVAC and drainlines and plumbing and electric ready for wall sheetrock (after the window sills are installed- we had to pull out the old ones- they were rotted. We need to do the bathroom too: slate and marble and sadly the sink got chipped. I so look forward to living as a sane person.
Opening a gallery and having a place to live and have a studio. In these crazy economic times.

So I showed my work to a museum curator. I've been submitting to more opportunities both photo and public art. Walked in Kanza Flint Hills yesterday. Love taking the photos, and wondering how to put them out there as I am a shy introvert. Would love a way to take photos using a microscope- back to my childhood experience of looking through my father's microscope at his collection of specimen slides.